I have just learned that I am highly sensitive... what now?
Becoming aware of one's hypersensitivity involves major inner upheavals which go through phases which can vary from one person to another. But it is these same upheavals that lead to a necessary trigger that will change the rest of your life.
It is not always easy to accept being highly sensitive when those around us and society expect us to “make an effort” to adapt to the famous mold. It is when others express themselves on the subject of high sensitivity, after having often hidden it too, that we realize that we are not alone, and that our way of functioning is legitimate.
Putting a name to all our feelings is extremely liberating, but until we accept our sensitivity, many people go through intermediate periods such as anger or sometimes even depression.
THE DIFFERENT PHASES
When we discover that we are highly sensitive, it is like finding the last piece of the puzzle that had been hidden from us and that we were desperately looking for. We had all these pieces assembled: our feeling of disconnect, our overflowing emotions, our need for solitude, our love of beauty, our discomfort in crowds, our intense relationships, our incredible intuition, our visceral reactions to violence, our silent tears in the face of suffering, our childish joys, our incredible empathy,... a pretty painting but without a title because we were missing the main piece.
Then one day, through our research, we can finally put meaning and a word to everything we experience on a daily basis and what we feel. Finally the pieces of the puzzle come together!
We are HIGHLY SENSITIVE.
So we are in a euphoric phase and we feel great RELIEF. Finally we have a coherent picture of ourselves: hyperesthesia, hyperstimulation, empathy, intuition, intense emotions, etc. All the boxes (or a majority) of the characteristics of hypersensitivity are checked, and we finally feel seen and validated. Our experience takes on meaning, we have a new understanding of our functioning and our reactions.
Then comes the ANGER phase, for two reasons.
The first is towards those who have constantly teased, criticised, humiliated and belittled us because of our emotional reactions... and who made us believe that we had a problem.
The second is to realise that negative comments will continue throughout life and that we will have to live with this difference, alongside a majority who persist in not understanding us. We realise that, despite wider awareness, there is a stigma around being sensitive, and the thought of having to continually explain sensitivity throughout our lives makes us cringe.
A third phase, much more delicate, can appear in some highly sensitive people: DEPRESSION. Fortunately, it does not affect everyone, but it can be present. In this case, it is important to get help from a professional so as not to be left alone.
Last phase: ACCEPTANCE
Hypersensitivity is a gift of life even if it sometimes feels a little poisoned. Learning to know yourself is the key to acceptance. This means informing yourself, surrounding yourself with other highly sensitive people, and above all putting in place healthy boundaries that highly sensitive people often lack, as well as a self-care routine.
(Not sure if you're highly sensitive? Here are the signs of a highly sensitive person. You can also take the test here )
AND NOW?
If you have just learned that you are highly sensitive, you may be feeling a little confused because you have spent years trying to be normal by suppressing your emotions and trying to be like everyone else.
You may be wondering: what should I do now with this new information?
If, despite the relief, you don't know how to manage your sensitivity, contact me! It is 100% possible to learn to manage your high sensitivity and your emotions. We will take stock together and I will help you connect to your true self and become the most fearless and authentic version of yourself.
Send me a message for more info, then sit back, grab some tea or coffee, and get ready to finally learn how to manage your emotions and understand your hypersensitivity.
✨ I'm sending you lots of beautiful positive vibes! ✨
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