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Open letter to the ones who don’t always understand me…

For all of you who recognize themselves in these words... feel free to share them.

gratitude

"There is something I have always wanted to tell you and the time is now…

I can feel that sometimes you are annoyed by my reactions, that my emotions exasperate you… don’t tell me it’s not true because I also know when you’re lying to me, that's one aspect of my personality.


I am a Highly Sensitive Empath. Don't roll your eyes, it isn’t another snowflake trendy condition to be special and get more attention. But don't feel sorry for me either, it is not a disease or a disorder. You won’t catch it, it's not contagious. I was just born this way. My brain is a little different than yours, my mirror neurons fire up at a greater level than the average. But I am not the only one wired this way, we are about 20% of the population. So… minority maybe, but I feel so blessed to be part of it. It is a very unique characteristic, you know, like my eyes or the shape of my face. My brain has just a little more activity than yours, so my thoughts, my feelings, and my emotions are much more intense than an average person. Overall, I process and capture more information than you. So yes… I think a lot… All the time…


So not only do I think a lot, you would probably say too much, but I also intensely perceive all that is around me… smells, noises, light, each of my five senses are heightened. And if it wasn’t enough, I can also feel people’s energy… tension, stress, fear. So can you imagine how overwhelming it is when others' emotions invade me? They called it empathy, I call it emotional sponge… this ability to put yourself in someone's shoes, to understand and feel what they’re going through.


See… when you talk to me, I don't just hear you, I listen to you deeply, intensely. I can pick up the tiniest inflection in your voice, and detect the slightest change on your face. So yes! I live everything more intensely. I often hear you telling me that I am too much, that every little detail affects me, that I get upset for nothing, that I should get over it, but it would be like me asking you to change the color of your eyes or change the shape of your nose, could you? Of course not. Well, in the same way, I can't change how my brain works. That's how I am, this is me with my little differences.

I am very emotional, cry a lot… too often? You might be right… Pain, sadness, injustice and even anger can overwhelm me when the external stimuli are too strong.


But my joie de vivre, my enthusiasm, my sensitivity, my passion have no limit either...


The beauty touches me, birds flying by my window, touch me. Two elderly people walking holding hands, touch me. The wrinkled face of an old woman touches me. Do you want me to go on?

Where you would only see a tree, I would see wisdom. Where you would only see a cloud, I would see animals passing by. Where you would only see a leaf, I would see the refuge of a ladybug.


I have developed very strong defense mechanisms to hide from being hurt and misunderstood, from being labeled “too much”, from being brushed off when I care and from being dismissed of my feelings.


Do you know how many times I wished I was different, how many times I wished I cared less and walked away from many situations, unconcerned and detached. I just can’t. Like I can't either fit into the boxes that your world imposes on me. And to be authentic, I don't want to fit in anyway.


Let me be me. Just let me show you the world with my eyes. Let me make you taste my reality and show you my vision of the world, how vibrant are the colors, how love is the only answer, but please, protect me when I lose my balance and everything seems so difficult. Take me in your arms and let me hide, when the world is too hard and too cruel. Cover me with your gaze when I feel so alone, so lost in the middle of the crowd. Listen to me, and above all, believe in me when I talk to you about all these invisible things that I can't explain to myself, but that I feel so strongly.

If you believe me, if you care for me just as I am, with these little glitches that are my strength. Then I will hold your hand until the end of the road, and I will take you all the way up in a wonderful place, right next to the stars."


What is your biggest struggle?

  • Feeling emotionally drained

  • Moving on and letting go

  • Criticism and conflict

  • Being under pressure


 

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